The hallway was bustling with students. I felt claustro claustrophobic and would've thrown up if not for the saving grace of, well, Grace. Grace Lewski had been my friend since we were born. We share the same birthday, at the same time, in the same hospital. Most chalk this up to coincidence, but my mom always believed we were destined to be best friends. We did become best friends, making her next prophecy about us dating, luckily no truth had been found in so far. Don't get m wrong, she had a good build, slender hips and good sized thighs, smooth skin, never showed off what she had. Blonde hair down past her shoulders a few inches, and the most beautiful blue green eyes. Don't ask me why I take note of this. If i paid this much attention to everything else in school I'd be the highsc high school equivalent to Sherlock and Watson. You could say something scares me about the prospect of dating, but I couldn't even begin to try to explain it. I presume its better to leave it untouched than to delve into it, I don't know what I'd find that deep yet, and hope I don't know for a while.
"Jace, you look queasy. C'mon, we have every class together this year. First period is this way." She dragged me down the edge of the hallway narrowly missing many doors and lockers. I always wondered if she new how sensual she looked when she dressed business like for school or is she just assumed that God had made her ugly so she'd focus on him. Well, I guess either works for me, as long as she doesn't focus on thinking she needs to fix her 'ugly'. I followed her as best as I could without losing my arm in the process. I knew where first period was, but honestly I didn't want her hand to leave mine. She finally reached first period and let go of my hand. We both took one step into the classroom and as soon as we did as if on cue the bell began to ring. I took a seat next to Grace on the side of the room closest to the door, third row back to her left. She sat on the outside chair.
"Jace, I've heard this teacher is kinda mean. Lot's of seniors this year said they were on meds to finish this class." Grace whispered into my ear. I couldn't even focus on what she said. All of a sudden I was feeling the heat of her breath on my ear and neck and I naturally started to lean in willing her lips to touch my ear. Wham! The door slammed shut at the front of the classroom and I was taken aback for a second. I had never gotten that feeling from Grace before. What was happening to me, I could only guess was either puberty or love. Maybe a bit of both. Whoa.
The rest of the school day was a blur. I got everything I needed for parents to sign and homework to begin. Grace and I walked out of the building towards our cars. I walked right next to her, looking at my feet unless I stole a glace at her face. She blushed a little each time I looked up. Now, usually school parking lots are relatively close to the school for ease of teachers and students, but there was a little known strip of parking on near perfect asphalt that was in a tree covered area just past the football stadium. Usually, Grace would go to her car to change and I'd stand watch although it was almost never needed and then we would walk back to the track around the football field and run one or two miles depending on our workload that day. Seeing as today was day 1, we decided two miles/
"Don't look Jace, or I might just have to tell your mom you're in love" She smiled genuinely and then slipped into her mercedes and began to change. I stood back to the window facing the football stadium. As per usual, no one was attending the band practicing on the field. Our football team long ago decided to practice in the morning and late at night, so the band took the after school time.
"Ok, I'm done changing." Grace said smoothly as she exited the car. She now wore blue tights with her blue nike running shoes and a grey tank top that covered all but the slightest sliver of her straps from her yellow sports bra. Man this is getting worse. I paused and looked at the ground. She moved closer looking at me with an inquisitive face,
"You look as if ou've done something wrong. You can talk to me Jay." She never called me Jay. The last time she did was at the Junior High dance on Valentines day when I asked if she would be my Valentine. I think it was her way of telling me that her full attention no matter what I said was focused purely on making me happy as best as she could.
"Grace... We've been friends forever. Literally. Have you ever... Ever thought, about, I don't know... More than best friends?" I immediately regretted those words. Not because of her reaction. Not because of her face she made. I didn't even regret it because she turned me down. I regretted it, simply because I didn't think it was the right thing to say. Her reaction was more akin to laughing at a joke then realizi realising ng the joke was a very serious matter, and she needed to consider it.
"Jay... I didn't, I didn't know you felt that way. Actually, I thought you liked Krystina." She looked at me and smiled slightly. I subconsciously moved my fingers across hers, sliding my finger tips slowly up her arm eventually reaching the shoulder moving laterally then continuing vertically at her neck, I slid my hand ever so slightly against her cheek leaving it there. She pushed her cheek against my hand as if in confirmation that it was ok. I kept it pushed lightly against her skin lifting up her dropped chin a little, and she moved in slowly standing on her tiptoes to be closer to my height and our lips met. I closed my eyes and kissed her slowly.
I've never kissed a girl before, so the feeling of this beautiful kiss was like fire flooding through my veins. It started to pump adrenaline through my whole body tensing every muscle and making my nerves go crazy. My stomach felt like it was Olympic pole vaulting. After a few seconds the kiss ended with us slowly pulling our lip apart, myself reluctantly, and for her I could only guess the same. I slid my arms around her waist and she hugged me. Tightly keeping me close she buried her head in my shoulder rubbing her hands down my back lightly.
I whispered through her hair, "Grace... I really like you." She responded with a muffled, "I like you a lot too." Squeezing he arms once then pulling out of hug she looked me in the eyes, and I stood there, frozen in the stare of the most beautiful girl in the world.
"Dinner and a movie Friday night? My place?" I stood there, just as nervous as I was before we kissed.
"If I get to feel like that again... I'd go to Antarctica to watch a movie with you."
And with that, one of the happiest years of my life began.
"Jace, you look queasy. C'mon, we have every class together this year. First period is this way." She dragged me down the edge of the hallway narrowly missing many doors and lockers. I always wondered if she new how sensual she looked when she dressed business like for school or is she just assumed that God had made her ugly so she'd focus on him. Well, I guess either works for me, as long as she doesn't focus on thinking she needs to fix her 'ugly'. I followed her as best as I could without losing my arm in the process. I knew where first period was, but honestly I didn't want her hand to leave mine. She finally reached first period and let go of my hand. We both took one step into the classroom and as soon as we did as if on cue the bell began to ring. I took a seat next to Grace on the side of the room closest to the door, third row back to her left. She sat on the outside chair.
"Jace, I've heard this teacher is kinda mean. Lot's of seniors this year said they were on meds to finish this class." Grace whispered into my ear. I couldn't even focus on what she said. All of a sudden I was feeling the heat of her breath on my ear and neck and I naturally started to lean in willing her lips to touch my ear. Wham! The door slammed shut at the front of the classroom and I was taken aback for a second. I had never gotten that feeling from Grace before. What was happening to me, I could only guess was either puberty or love. Maybe a bit of both. Whoa.
The rest of the school day was a blur. I got everything I needed for parents to sign and homework to begin. Grace and I walked out of the building towards our cars. I walked right next to her, looking at my feet unless I stole a glace at her face. She blushed a little each time I looked up. Now, usually school parking lots are relatively close to the school for ease of teachers and students, but there was a little known strip of parking on near perfect asphalt that was in a tree covered area just past the football stadium. Usually, Grace would go to her car to change and I'd stand watch although it was almost never needed and then we would walk back to the track around the football field and run one or two miles depending on our workload that day. Seeing as today was day 1, we decided two miles/
"Don't look Jace, or I might just have to tell your mom you're in love" She smiled genuinely and then slipped into her mercedes and began to change. I stood back to the window facing the football stadium. As per usual, no one was attending the band practicing on the field. Our football team long ago decided to practice in the morning and late at night, so the band took the after school time.
"Ok, I'm done changing." Grace said smoothly as she exited the car. She now wore blue tights with her blue nike running shoes and a grey tank top that covered all but the slightest sliver of her straps from her yellow sports bra. Man this is getting worse. I paused and looked at the ground. She moved closer looking at me with an inquisitive face,
"You look as if ou've done something wrong. You can talk to me Jay." She never called me Jay. The last time she did was at the Junior High dance on Valentines day when I asked if she would be my Valentine. I think it was her way of telling me that her full attention no matter what I said was focused purely on making me happy as best as she could.
"Grace... We've been friends forever. Literally. Have you ever... Ever thought, about, I don't know... More than best friends?" I immediately regretted those words. Not because of her reaction. Not because of her face she made. I didn't even regret it because she turned me down. I regretted it, simply because I didn't think it was the right thing to say. Her reaction was more akin to laughing at a joke then realizi realising ng the joke was a very serious matter, and she needed to consider it.
"Jay... I didn't, I didn't know you felt that way. Actually, I thought you liked Krystina." She looked at me and smiled slightly. I subconsciously moved my fingers across hers, sliding my finger tips slowly up her arm eventually reaching the shoulder moving laterally then continuing vertically at her neck, I slid my hand ever so slightly against her cheek leaving it there. She pushed her cheek against my hand as if in confirmation that it was ok. I kept it pushed lightly against her skin lifting up her dropped chin a little, and she moved in slowly standing on her tiptoes to be closer to my height and our lips met. I closed my eyes and kissed her slowly.
I've never kissed a girl before, so the feeling of this beautiful kiss was like fire flooding through my veins. It started to pump adrenaline through my whole body tensing every muscle and making my nerves go crazy. My stomach felt like it was Olympic pole vaulting. After a few seconds the kiss ended with us slowly pulling our lip apart, myself reluctantly, and for her I could only guess the same. I slid my arms around her waist and she hugged me. Tightly keeping me close she buried her head in my shoulder rubbing her hands down my back lightly.
I whispered through her hair, "Grace... I really like you." She responded with a muffled, "I like you a lot too." Squeezing he arms once then pulling out of hug she looked me in the eyes, and I stood there, frozen in the stare of the most beautiful girl in the world.
"Dinner and a movie Friday night? My place?" I stood there, just as nervous as I was before we kissed.
"If I get to feel like that again... I'd go to Antarctica to watch a movie with you."
And with that, one of the happiest years of my life began.
"Life is like a horror movie, broken up by heaven like commercial breaks. This was the ultimate commercial, and now it is time to return to your scheduled programming."
Five Years Later
Today four years ago, I drove home alone for the first time in my life. April sixteenth, twenty-sixteen marks four years since the accident. I never truly recovered from what happened. twenty-twelve, April sixteenth, two days after my birthday, it happened. She was gone.
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